I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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