i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
