Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
