your thong is hanging out like whoa
What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
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