And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
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