you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
