You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Randomize
