So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
