"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
