I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize