Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
