if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
