return my video game
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
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