The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
