We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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