it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
