I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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