He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
