do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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