I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
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