So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
