It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
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