He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
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