You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
