i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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