Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
