You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Randomize