please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize