The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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