her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
