Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize