now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
