:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize