I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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