Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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