The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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