A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
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