he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.