You smell like a Billy Joel song
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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