sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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