so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
