Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i will never coherently bang her
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
