Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
