so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
