just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
kristin has been a bad kristin
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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