The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
