What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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