Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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