butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
im six kinds of drunk right now
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
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