i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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