U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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