one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize