Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
These tits shall not be calmed
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
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